What exactly is micro and macro management
and how is it applied to BDSM. These questions are
consistently raised within the BDSM community. Research on the
net proved to be fruitless for few websites mentioned
this phenomenon, so I took it upon myself to analyze
this topic and correlate them into a somewhat readable
formal definition of Micromanagement is:
Micro-management is an example of poor
management where the manager over-manages people
unnecessarily. The manager may be motivated by concern
for details. The effect, however, may be to de-motivate
employees and create resentment. Micro implies extremely
small in scale and scope or capability. Applied in a
BDSM sense, as an example, this is when the Master
demands/orders us to keep a clean house (macro
and then stands over us the whole time and tells
us how to do the cleaning (micro management). Or if the
Master request us to cook healthy well balanced meals
(macro) and then proceeds to inform us what to cook and
how to cook it. That is micro
They have no clear sense of their role within
the relationship. They think this is what they
should be doing. Going into a 24/7 TPE is definitely a
major step and one not to be taken lightly. So when a
Master goes into this type of relationship clearly not
knowing what is expected of Him, then they automatically
assume this is their role.
There has been no previously agreed upon set
of terms between the Master and slave. The Master
erroneously believes that micro management is His
is no clear set of rules to define which decision
belongs to the Master and which decision belongs to the
Master may want healthy home cooked meals and demands
that of the slave, that is Macro management but if He
then goes to stove and informs her of how and what to
cook, then He is now micro managing. With no set
terms and guidelines, nor any pre-discussion of these
issues, then Masters will have a tendency to venture
into the slaves area of responsibility, simply because
there is no one there to tell them not
Management of day-to-day issues is what
Masters know from real life. Most of us don't "lead"
in our every day lives. Most of us "do". Many
Masters/Doms that we have met are in positions of
control and power outside the home. That does not end
when He returns home at night. And engaging in a BDSM
lifestyle may only intensify that
They are Masters; they are here to lead us,
the slaves. So they have every right to
micro-manage. Which is absolutely true as long as one is
aware of the dangers (see below) in doing
Remnants of Crisis If the relationship or
the slave has just experienced a crisis then the Master
jumps in with both feet. Trying to correct the situation
and make sure the slave comes out as a survivor. In
times of crisis most people will micro manage in order
to get past the situation. Once the crisis time is over,
though, then things should return to normal. The danger
here is that the memory of crisis becomes
institutionalized. Lingering long after the crisis has
ended. The Master continues to act as if there is a
crisis long after the crisis is over, micromanaging from
some cellular level.
Fear - At the root of virtually all
micromanagement is fear. Fear that if they don't do it,
no one else will (or no one will do it as well). Fear
that the slave will fail will have horrible things
happen to them. Fears about money. When Masters
micromanage, they are usually concerned about the health
and safety of the slave. If you can keep in mind that
Masters micromanage because they care and therefore have
fears and concerns, and NOT because they are power
hungry control freaks, then we are better equipped to
deal with the issue of micromanaging.
You are completely and totally in
You are aware of every move your slave
The slave can and will be come completely
dependent upon You
It will ultimately limit the growth of a slave.
Can stifle a slave’s success.
It is a bad habit that's difficult to break.
There is a high rate of failure, anxiety, and
depression, caused by the inability of the Master/Owner
to step aside and let their slave/sub basked in the joy
of efficiently and elegantly serving the Master and
showing Him/Her what They created.
Micro management can be tiring; the Master can
get bogged by the minuet day to day task of managing and
controlling everything the slave does. This can result
in confusion for the slave and her inability
When an owner is involved in every aspect of the
slave’s actions, his or her ability to focus on any one
area is diminished and signs of pending problems are
often missed. And since there is never a break
from the slave and her actions, Master, BDSM burnout is
a common consequence, which often leads to relationship
It is inefficient and in effective to micro
manage a slave. If you’re watching over her every move
then what are You accomplishing.
Can stifle the slave’s
Low self-confidence due to the dependency upon
the Master to make and control all decisions and aspects
of the slave’s life.
structure permitting little or no
It is very
difficult to define Macro Management but in general
terms it implies on a larger scale. More freedom and
liberties are granted where the manager allows the staff
to partake in more of the business operations. In a BDSM
sense, I believe it implies the managing of a slave on a
larger scale. As stated above, ordering the slave to
prepare healthy meals would be an example of macro
management. It is usually more efficient to macro manage
numerous slave activities then it is to try to micro
manage all of the slaves activities.
Too much freedom will result in confusion within
Macro Management can result in the Master not
having or exerting enough control upon the slave.
Feelings of inadequacies within the slave due to
not having enough control exerted upon them
The Master is able to maintain appropriate level
of control over His property.
If a crisis arises, the Master will be able to
focus His control on the crisis at hand and micro manage
that specific situation.
Teaches the slave responsibility
Allows the slave to prioritize.
Allows for a well-rounded development.
Reduced risk of burn out.
Provides flexibility for the slave.
Enhances productivity of both Master and
Greater flexibility for both slave and
Increased self-confidence and self-esteem for
slave as she contributes and makes daily decisions based
on what her Master has taught her and what she believes
Consistent approach to managing the slave.
Macro management allows the slave to maintain
some of her independence even if the Master gives that
independence to her by allowing and trusting in her to
make her own decisions on certain aspects of her life.
healthy BDSM relationship there is a balance between
Macro and Micro management. This balance is dependent
upon the two partners and what they desire. In a BDSM
relationship we often fantasize about doing or being
micro-managed however in reality, to completely perform
this tasks is almost impossible. Environmental
influences have to be correct in order for a complete
micro-management situation to occur. As a slave, the
Master cannot micro manage you if you work. For He then
is not there to tell you how to drive, what station to
listen to on the radio, or how to deal with issues at
work. These are your responsibility. Hence He is not
idea of discussing this is for individuals to become
aware of what exactly micro and macro management is. And
that in fantasy micro management is appealing but in
reality there are many issues and consequences to
actually achieving 24/7 micro management. Each
relationship is unique and each relationship
incorporates some aspect of both micro and macro
It is a balancing act and problems arise when the
scales become unequal or when the transition is too
intense or too rapid. A Master cannot just walk into a
slaves life and begin to micro manage, as with
everything else within this lifestyle, time, trust,
honesty, integrity, and respect are paramount in the building
of a healthy BDSM relationship.
if You are a micromanager, or have a tendency to
micromanage large parts of Your slaves actions and life,
then You need to change if You want Your slave to
thrive. Only by letting go will You create a slave
that can operate without You -- yet still maintain in
her heart and her actions what will please You.
Operating without You does not mean independence it
means the slave knows what brings You pleasure and is
capable of making those decisions to reflect that.
Slaves that are capable of operating without the Owner
are also more likely to survive a crisis, to survive the
relationship, to maintain their level of self-confident
and self-esteem. This is needed to have a healthy